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I spent some time reading through my past posts. I do tend to be obnoxiously self-reflective, don't I? I'm afraid that's not going to change. It seems I only make time to write when I'm in a reflective mood. Studying design forces me to live in a world of abstractions. I have a million ideas but none of them will become reality. It's very frustrating. Sometimes it's hard to find concrete things in my life to guage my progress by. So I'm stealing this idea from Karen as a chronicle of my past year, to prove that it wasn't all in my head.

January: For good or ill school has defined my life the past three years and January was a month of transition. A new semester began with one professor leaving Utah State for an international position, and I began studying under another one. I also began my search for an internship.

February: Event producer Scott Corridan came as a visiting designer. I made him cry. I spent the rest of the month preparing for our next visiting designer. The lack of sleep made me cry.

March: Jamie Drake came as our second visiting designer. He said I was daring. I found out I won honorable mention in the International Design Guild/ASID rug design competition. I applied to GSBS for an internship, and went to Las Vegas and Los Angeles on a design trip. At NeoCon West I met Karim Rashid.

April: I had an interview and got my internship. The semester wound down, leaving me in utter exhaustion. My nephew Aiden was born. I began blogging.

May: I found out I won honorable mention in the IIDA Sustainable Design competition. I saw Sigor Ros in concert and moved to Salt Lake to begin my internship.

June: I worked at GSBS and loved every minute of it. The month ended with the Theresa Bradly Spirit Award at Design Awareness.

July: I sadly left my internship, but not before applying for another one at G. I flew to London and spent most of the month there. It was hot. Very, very hot.

August: I moved on to Paris before flying home to crash for two weeks after a summer as a nomad. I was offered the G internship and school began again.

September: I'm finally a senior and won 1st place commercial and 2nd place residential in an ASID competition. I begin working as an undergraduate teaching fellow. I also started an IIDA Campus Center at school and was put on the IDSA board.

October: I worked. I worked on projects, on my job, and on my honors thesis.

November: I organized an IIDA campaign to donate stockings to children with cancer. I started working part time at GSBS and volunteered at Greenbuild in Denver, flying home in time to see my brother get married. On the 28th my grandmother died.

December: I went to my grandmother's funeral and two days later my sister-in-law's father died. After two funerals in a week I finished three projects and travelled to Salt Lake seven times. Thankfully the last week has been very quiet.

The year is ending and a new one beginning. I hope 2007 will be a little more peaceful, but no less eventful.

What a Difference a Year Makes

It's amazing the perspective a little rest can give you. The past month has been hard. It's been intense and exhausting, but it's been no harder than any other month. Life has a way of evening itself out. For every trial there is a blessing.

This last year I've lost people who were important to me, but I've met incredible new people. I've travelled and had the chance to learn in ways I could never anticipate. I've learned to relax, to let go, and to trust that everything that is meant to happen will - in the right way and right time. I know what is important to me and what doesn't matter at all.

We've lost two members of the family this year, but we've gained two as well. I have a new nephew and a new sister-in-law. I got two internships - one at GSBS and a second next summer at G. I also got a job.

I've travelled, and made up for lost time doing it. In 2006 I spent time in Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Denver, London and Paris. I moved to Salt Lake City for two months, and drive back there every week to work. I've gained confidence while I wasn't looking. I've won a few competitions that have opened doors. I've filled sketchbooks. I've written and blogged and taken thousands of pictures. I've done more than I could have planned for, or hoped for, or conceived of. It's amazing what a year brings. I wonder what will happen in the next one.

I was recently told by an architect that the definition of luck is proper preparation combined with an attitude of openness to the possibilities. The work is hard and taking risks is frightening, but the rewards are rich and worth the effort. There are a lot of things I wish for, even more I hope for. All I can do now is be open and trust. That is the definition of faith.

Breathe Out

In less than three weeks I've had a wedding and two funerals take place in my family. Throw into that mix finals week with multiple projects due, the latest in a succession of crappy birthdays (yea for December, everyone is too busy to notice), and weekly trips to Salt Lake to work, and I am exhausted. Overwhelmed and utterly exhausted. All I have to do is make it to graduation, but that doesn't feel like it will ever happen. It's the middle of the night and I'm even too tired to sleep.

So for you, and mostly for me, I present a bit of visual bliss. Next semester my senior thesis will involve research on the work of Santiago Calatrava. Just looking at these images helps me relax. They feel like modern cathedrals.

When it rains . . .

Today I went to my second funeral in less than a week. This time it was for my sister-in-law's father. I feel so bad for her and her family. And I'm sad for my little nephews who will never know their grandfather. The past few weeks have been overwhelming.

Myron Dee Bigler

August 21st, 1948 - December 4th, 2006

Obituary:

HYRUM, UTAH: Myron Dee Bigler of Hyrum Utah, died suddenly on Monday, December 4, 2006. Myron was born in Basin, Wyoming on August 21, 1948 to Orville Bigler and Elvira Dobson Bigler. Myron married Georgia Fay Thomas in the Salt Lake Temple on June 1, 1972. They are the parents of two sons and two daughters: Jason (Mindy) Bigler of St. Helens, Oregon; Rachell (Bron) Murdock of Hyde Park; Amber (Todd) Smith of Nibley, and Dedrick Bigler of Hyrum. Myron was raised on a small farm in Basin, the ninth child in a large family of eleven children. He attended Basin High School where he played on the basketball team. Later, he attended Ricks College where he received an associate degree. He was an active member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and throughout his life served in various capacities and callings. In 1967-69, he served a mission in the Colombia/Venezuela Mission. He had a strong love and unwavering faith in his Savior. Myron had a deep love for people and his friendly and open manner drew people to him He was strong and steadfast and accomplished things without fanfare or self adulation. He was loved by all who knew him. He was a man generous with his time and talents and always put others before himself. For many years Myron was a technician for Thiokol, working on the Minute Man missile and Space Shuttle rocket booster projects. He also worked for Logan City and did various part time jobs. Myron was a hard worker and did all he could to provide a comfortable living for his family. For twenty years he served his country in the U.S. Naval Reserve, retiring in June of 2006 with the rank of E-6. He is survived by his wife Georgia of 34 years, 4 children and 7 grandchildren. He is also survived by four brothers: Edwin (Clara) of Layton, UT; Dale (Joan) of Elkridge, UT, Perie (Floie) of Clean Creek, AZ, Bill (Julie) of Vernal, UT and four sisters: Charmayne (Tom) Kasperian of Taylorsville, UT; Edith (Bill) Johnson of Nacogdoches, TX; Donna (Dawan) Cecil of Cypress, CA; and Roseann (Randy) Bishop of Westchester, PA. Myron was preceded in death by his mother and father, Ruth Bigler a step-mother, infant sister Alice and a brother Dean (Wendy) Bigler. The funeral will be held at 12:00 PM on Friday, December 8, 2006 at the Hyrum Stake Center, 595 S. 200 E., Hyrum. Funeral arrangements are under the direction of Allen-Hall Mortuary, located at 34 E. Center in Logan. Friends and family may call at the mortuary from 6:00 to 8:00 p.m. on Thursday, and at the church on Friday from 10:30 - 11:45 am. Interment will be at the Hyrum City Cemetery with a military gravesite tribute.

Breathe In

I went to school yesterday and was told to go home and not come back until I was ready. I appreciate that. I need a little time to catch my breath.

Just as I was leaving the sun lit up the sky. The air was bitter cold after Tuesday's snow and the silhouettes of the trees were lovely. I'm glad I had my camera with me.





The scene fit my mood on many levels.

I recently came across a website with an image that I also think is lovely. The Night and Day World Map shows you what part of the world is currently in darkness, and what part is light. In spite of my stand against light pollution I think images of the earth at night are gorgeous.



My family and I are doing fine. We're in that strange post-passing, pre-funeral limbo when no one's sure what to do. That will be over soon and then I'll have to get back to work.

Obituary

Thelma Brierley Murdock of Kaysville, died Tuesday, November 28, 2006 in Logan, Utah following an extended illness. Thelma was born in Park City, Utah on February 6, 1923 to James W. “Bob” Brierley and Christy Clegg. She was the oldest daughter in a family of three boys and four girls. Thelma married John H Murdock on Feb. 5, 1945 in Alliance, Nebraska. Their marriage was later solemnized in the Salt Lake Temple. They are the parents of three sons and one daughter; Steven John (Cheri) of Logan, Kristine Murdock of Layton, Brent Heber (Mary) of Jackson, Wyo., and Alan James (Helen) of Black River, N.Y.

Thelma grew up as a young girl in Park City and later moved with her family to Heber City, Utah. She graduated from Wasatch High School, where she was active in many functions including serving as one of her junior class officers. During World War II she was a telephone operator and was awarded a War Service Certificate for working at the Heber Telephone Company. Following their marriage, Thelma and John moved to the town of Kaysville. This was to be their home for the next fifty-five years.

Thelma was a master of all the domestic arts and was an exemplary wife and mother. She especially enjoyed crocheting, knitting and cooking. She crocheted dozens of afghans and tied quilts that were given to people with special needs. She was an excellent cook and made sure that anyone who visited her home never left hungry. Her holiday meals were legendary. At Christmas time, her Santa Claus cookies were of such fine craftsmanship that no one dared eat them. Her home-made fudge was divine. Thelma was a very kind and considerate person who loved all her family and friends and was greatly loved in return. Her life was one of loving service to others. She met the needs of those around her before her own. She provided a secure and comfortable home for her family and a place where everyone was welcome. She will be greatly missed by all who loved her.

Thelma was an active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and throughout her life and served in various capacities in the Kaysville First Ward. For several years she sang in the ward choir, was a counselor in the Young Women’s MIA and held special positions in the Relief Society. She had a strong testimony and unwavering faith in her Savior and His Church. She now joins with her beloved mother and father and a sister and three brothers who proceeded her in death. For several years, she was employed as a cook at Kaysville Junior High for the Davis School District where she made friends among fellow workers, students and teachers. She used her earnings to help her children in their schooling and helped pay for one son’s mission. She was generous with her time, talents and money. She was very resourceful and her home was always neat, clean and organized. She is survived by her husband John of over 60 years, four children, thirteen grandchildren and eight great- grandchildren. Also surviving are two sisters: Bertha (Clark) Woodbury of St. George, Norita (Sharron) Winterton of Charleston and two brothers: Wayne (Leva) Brierley of Roy and Howard (Connie) Brierley of Layton. The funeral will be held on Saturday, December 2, 2006 at the Kaysville First Ward Chapel.

Goodbye

My grandma, Thelma Murdock, passed away about 12 hours ago. She was the perfect grandma. Her cooking was amazing. She always had a jar full of cookies and a purse full of Necco wafers. Thanksgiving and Christmas were events to remember. She crocheted beautiful afghans and made me a little kewpie doll in a pink dress when my mom gave birth to brother number three. I got my curly hair from her.

This is the first grandparent that I've lost, and while she is finally at peace it's a difficult time for the rest of us. It's comforting to know that she is with her parents and siblings and others she loved so much. The funeral will be on Saturday and I have family flying in from out of state. It will be good to be together, especially now.

Walking and Sketching

Inspite of an overwhelming amount of work to do before the end of the semester I took a break and went for a walk around campus. A storm is moving in and the ground is covered with a beautiful dusting of snow. I stopped by the bookstore and bought a new sketching pencil in terracotta to break out of my usual black and white mode.

I stopped outside the Merrill-Cazier Library and made a quick sketch to try out the pencil. It has a waxy feel, but the color lays down nicely and doesn't smear. It was truly a quick sketch - I was sitting on cold concrete.

I was gone almost an hour and it felt good to get some fresh air. I think I may be able to get some work done now.

When I got back to my desk an envelope was waiting for me. It contained our IIDA (International Interior Design Association) Campus Center certificate. We're official! This is the first year our school has been a Campus Center and it's exciting to have proof of all the hard work.

If I were a state . . .

Oddly, this is my result!

You're Utah!

You are extremely busy, one might even say as a bee. With a fondness for salt and colorful rocks, you believe in marrying early and, if possible, often. You're not above going on television or door to door for what you believe in, no matter how many people think you're a little bit strange. Despite rumors to the contrary, you actually have nothing whatsoever to do with jazz.


Take the State Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

If I were a country . . .

Even more accurate . . .

You're the United Nations!

Most people think you're ineffective, but you are trying to completely save the world from itself, so there's always going to be a long way to go. You're always the one trying to get friends to talk to each other, enemies to talk to each other, anyone who can to just talk instead of beating each other about the head and torso. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't, and you get very schizophrenic as a result. But your heart is in the right place, and sometimes also in New York.


Take the Country Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid

If I were a book . . .

I've always felt like I belonged in a Jane Austin novel, but I'm open to the possibilities. My tree is calling . . .

You're Siddhartha!

by Hermann Hesse

You simply don't know what to believe, but you're willing to try anything once. Western values, Eastern values, hedonism and minimalism, you've spent some time in every camp. But you still don't have any idea what camp you belong in. This makes you an individualist of the highest order, but also really lonely. It's time to chill out under a tree. And realize that at least you believe in ferries.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Design Crisis

I found this quote on a forum at Design Community.

"In many ways, the environmental crisis is a design crisis. It is a consequence of how things are made, buildings are constructed, and landscapes are used. Design manifests culture, and culture rests firmly on the foundation of what we believe to be true about the world."
— Sim Van der Ryn, quoted in The Philosophy of Sustainable Design, by Jason McLennan

This reminds me of one of my favorite quotes by Bruce Mau.

"What if we could do anything? What if the questions surrounding design turned out to be the big questions? What if life itself became a design project? What if - as Arnold Toynbee once suggested - we were committed to an audacious, altruistic global project that imagined 'the welfare of the entire human race as a practical objective'? What if design turned out to be that project? What if we succeeded?"

The thought of "the welfare of the entire human race" as a practical design objective is intriguing. If it were true, then there is a corollary. Most of society's problems have been caused by bad design. If the problem is bad design, then the solution lies in good design. What if saving the world is easier than anyone realises?

Of course the next question is, "What is design?"

The Design of the World

My passion is my frustration.

I have accepted the curse of the designer. I will forever be able to see what is wrong, know how it could be better, and not have the power (the time, the ability, the money, the cooperation) to make a change. Even if I could, it is too much. There is too much that needs to be done, to many things that need to change. It is overwhelming to think about, to imagine. Yet I see it everywhere. It's not about the environment we live in. Though our environment influences every aspect of our lives. It's not about making things "look pretty", and never should. It's about making a difference. About making things better.

I have been blessed. I have been given more than I will ever deserve. It's humbling, and staggering, to think of all that I have. Now I feel a responsibility to give back. With everything that I know, and everything that I've experienced, it feels immoral for me not to do everything in my power to help others. I'm not trying to make people happy. It's not possible, and it's not right. Sometimes the thing you need is the thing you don't want, or the thing you fear. Change is hard. Change is agony and exhilaration. And change is a constant. You either move forward or you move back. Nothing stays the same.

Life is a choice and I have decisions to make. I pray that they will be wise ones. I will use this blog to raise questions as I continue to explore the world of design and my place in it.

Labyrinth

I've been a big Sting fan for as long as I can remember. I still think the early Police songs are some of the best pop songs ever written. What I love most about Sting is that he has consistently pushed the boundaries of what pop music is, and should be. He blurs boundaries between genres and the results are always beautiful.

The current bandwagon for aging rock stars is to release an album of standards. Sting isn't immune to this trend. He's been playing with the classics for the past 10 years. His cover of "My One and Only Love" is one of my favorites. But his new album has taken this concept to extremes. Songs From the Labyrinth is a selection of Elizabethan songs accompanied by lute. It's an intriguing concept and the results are surprisingly poignant. "Come Again" doesn't sound that different than a few of the songs on his 1987 release ". . . Nothing Like the Sun."

Four of the "new" songs are available to listen to online. Whether you like it or not, you'll be surprised.

Schmap!!

I was notified today that two of my photographs have been chosen for the Schmap Guide to London. They are pictures I took this summer while on study abroad. These weren't my best pictures, but here's a sneak peek.



This is the South Kensington Tube Station that was home for the three weeks I spent there.



Here are the beautiful gardens of Hampton Court. The day we were there was hot and the ongoing drought left everything yellow and wilting, but it was still stunning.

These pictures join the two pictures from my trip to South Carolina that were inculded in Schmap Myrtle Beach.



This is a mall parking lot during Bike Week.



And this is Ripley's Aquarium on the same day.

Does this mean I'm a published photographer? I need to keep traveling so they can use more of my pictures! I have trips to Denver and Chicago planned already . . .

Week in Review (a little late)

To hold myself accountable I will give you a report of the progress I made on the goals I set for myself last week. No organizing or cleaning got done, correspondence was partially written and I only averaged seven hours of sleep every two days, but I accomplished more than I expected. I said no twice, I saw the premiere of Lost, I relaxed for one entire night on Friday, I read the first chapter if Bruce Mau's Massive Change, and my plans for saving the world are firmly in place. Not bad results for such a crazy week. I should set short-term goals more often.

Progress

I am so proud of myself. I am well on my way to accomplishing my goals for the week. In spite of a deadline in the morning and a general proclivity towards being a workaholic, I took some time off this evening and watched the premier of Lost. And it was worth it! I've never seen a show as well written or executed as this.

I have also said no twice this week to things I was asked to help with but really don't have the time for. I'm still not doing well on getting enough sleep and have done no cleaning or organizing, but I'm making progress. I even have some plans for saving the world. I may not be able to do it by Monday, but I will do it.

My 10 Things

When I check in on three of the blogs I read regularly, and they all have the following lists, I guess that means I should do it too.

10 Things I Did This Week:

1. Received the LEED-NC 2.2 Reference Guide and began studying for the LEED AP exam.
2. Worked ridiculously hard on a class project and completed a mock up of the finished brochure.
3. Began work on another class project, which will be even harder.
4. Solved the mystery of the History of Architecture test scores.
5. Faxed in all the paperwork to organize USU's first Campus Center of the International Interior Design Association (IIDA).
6. Put together my Honors Thesis Committee, composed of two architects and a commercial designer.
7. Found a bunch of design competitions, compiled a list, and passed it out to the junior and senior studios.
8. Watched "The Lake House", the THIRD movie I've seen this year! It was about architects. Even when I try to take a break I can't!
9. Watched General Conference.
10. Drove to Clinton to visit my brother and his family, and to get some help on #2.

10 Things I Wanted to do This Week, But Didn't:

1. Send out thank you notes.
2. Get enough sleep.
3. Relax.
4. Clean my house.
5. Watch just a little bit of TV to know what's going on in the world.
6. Read.
7. Email a few people I need to keep in touch with.
8. Finish #2 on the first list, so I can get on to #3 on the first list without distraction.
9. Help with a wedding.
10. Back up my computer files.

10 Things That Made Me Smile:

1. My six year old niece who sounds out my name and spells it H-O-L-E.
2. My five month old nephew who just learned to roll over.
3. My four year old nephew who is obsessed with chocolate and Star Wars.
4. My four year old nephew (they're twins) who named his fish Murdock.
5. Winning the IDSA weekly photo contest and getting a candy bar.
6. International hits on my little blog.
7. Knowing that I'm making a contribution.
8. Fall leaves in the canyon.
9. Fresh salmon.
10. Getting a lot accomplished.

10 Things I WILL Accomplish Next Week:

1. Get my studio space organized.
2. Get IIDA records organized.
3. Say No to something.
   
4. Write all outstanding thank you notes and emails.
5. Take one evening to relax.
6. Get the equivalent of seven hours of sleep each night.
7. Read something I enjoy (whether it's design realted or not).
8. Clean my bedroom.
9. Watch the premier of Lost (harder to do with my schedule than you might think).
10. Save the world.
    

Let's Dance

Another one for Karen. I couldn't resist.

Depeche Mode's "Precious" [Early Version]

Precious [Early Version of video]

I love this song. It is, in fact, my cell phone ringtone. The video is very cool, but I prefer this one. It's fascinating from a creative viewpoint to see the process and the storyboarding. It makes me want to direct a video!